Clean Sheets Day...and some other thoughts...

Yep...the title said it really.  Today, and each Saturday, is Clean Sheets Day.

I am concerned sometimes that I am getting into a rut, with set days for certain things and what not...

But it is what it is.

And clean sheets are one of the joys of life!!

I quite love my bed actually!  It was given to me when my aunt and uncle moved to a smaller retirement home.  The bedding?  Well, I bought the duvet, but the sheets, and the lovely patchwork quilt on the top were all gifted to me as well.

It's a comfy bed...it's big enough for me to sprawl around in...and, yes, I don't share it with anybody or anything else except for the pink pig!

Sometimes it feels lonely.  

But most of the time right now, I'm glad.

You see, I was in a bad marriage for almost 15 years.  Why bad?  Because he was...no, is..a bad man.  We're talking domestic violence.  Abuse of any sort you wish to mention.  

Finally I came to my senses about 6 years ago, and left.  It's been a hard road to travel.  But I'm ok.  And this time "alone" has really been good for me.  I'm getting to know myself really well.  And my confidence is rebuilding itself.

No, I don't wish to be alone for the rest of my time on earth.  I hope with all my heart that one day I will meet a wonderful man who will give and accept love, and that we'll be happy together.

But in the meantime, I'm content.

I don't think that I'm going to be one of those people who sign up for every dating site on the internet, or answer personal ads in the newspaper, or whatever.

I suppose I fear being ripped off by someone who is pretending to be someone he isn't.

I also have this feeling that if I go hunting for Mr Wonderful, that I won't actually find him.  And then I'll just become bitter and disappointed.

No, I'm just going to live each day as fully as I can.  Be as interested in my own life as I can be.  And then, while I'm living my interesting life, and being happy in my life, all of a sudden.. there he'll be!  And guess what...that'll mean that if he's in a place where I've already chosen to be, because I'm interested in that thing...we'll already have something in common!

And who knows?  Maybe instead of having the bridesmaids head-dress and bouquet from my sisters' wedding hanging on my wall, it'll be my own Brides' things hanging instead!

I'm enjoying writing my drivel each day...I'm not sure if you read it all, but anyway... it's good for me to write this all, and give some typing space to my brain...thanks for the opportunity, Blogger!

Namaste

All content ©artysane

Love...and a couple of pics from home..

Hi there!

I really didn't have much idea of what to write about today, and then I looked through what I'd snapped with my camera, and well, let's see where this takes me!

I love hand made items in my home.  Most of them I've made myself..some have been gifts.  Rarely I've bought them.

These hearts were made my me at some time or another. They've hung in 4 different homes.  Three of those were in the States.  But now they live on a pretty stained glass door, which leads into my lounge.

Well, I say "my" lounge..we all know that the flat is rented...but it's still my little space to occupy until ... whenever!

The heart is, I think, the international sign for love, yes?  It seems that everyone knows it, whatever language you speak.

When I moved in here, I was happy for me, but a little sad for the couple who had just moved out.  They were splitting up.  The cats had been divided..what I mean is, one went to live with her, the other with him...so they were topsy-turvied too...

On the first morning I was here, I found evidence that once they were happy.  On the bathroom mirror.  After my shower.

And I haven't a picture of this, but there was the unmistakable heart, which one of them had, at one time, drawn on with their finger.

I still haven't the heart to clean it off.

It's not just hearts that show love, is it.  Actions speak louder than words, that's what they say.  

So when I bake, and give cookies to my sister's family, or cake to this person or that person, it's also showing love, in my opinion, just as surely as if I were drawing hearts all over the place.

I've had fun setting up my little home.  Mainly I've been using car boot sale, charity shop, or cast offs to do so...but sometimes you have to break down and spend money, which is what I did for the mixer.

But it's already been worth its' weight in gold to me!

I've this weekend off duty, so I plan to be back out in my kitchen again... peanut butter cookies may be on the menu!

Love.

Not just romantic. 

Namaste

All content ©artysane

Chocolate, Hips, and the eternal war between them

It seems to me that I have been at war with my body, regarding its' size anyway, for some time now.  

It's boring.

Problem is that a lot of my weight isn't even due to what I eat or don't eat.  A lot of it is a result of the medications I'm taking for the R.A.  And the asthma.  Steroids are wonderfully quick working meds.  But their side effects really stink a bit, my friends. 

So, here I am.  Trying, again, to fight the good fight to rescue people from the fear that I may suddenly sit upon them accidentally!  HA

 The "diet" has been going for a couple of weeks now.  I've been dreadful keeping with it.  I try to avoid cookies, and chocolate, and cheesecake, and ice cream and pasta and ...and...

Even though I'm good, it's so often just like this with me!  

Now, I'm not going to any slimming club at all.  Basically this is because of three reasons:

1.  I don't really have enough money to spend on my memberships etc

2.  Because of work, I can't guarantee that I'll be off duty on the required times.

and

3.  Surely I can find the will power and positive thinking and self control I need to do this?  Surely if I do the meditations from Quigong, it'll help me to lose this weight?

Hmmm..well, the very first weigh in I did (in private, on my mothers' scales) was discouraging.  I hadn't lost or gained a thing.  I just had to look on the positive.. 

But today, I could jump and be pleased.

Three and a half pounds have gone!

Oh yes, my friends, I'm on a roll now!

Namaste

All content ©artysane

Social Life

We all need at least one friend.  I am so fortunate to have many very good friends, both in this country and also in the other country in which I lived.

At first it was quite hard for me to get out and about when I came home to the UK.  But gradually I found people with whom I wanted to spend time with, and now I'm getting to have a vibrant network of people around me.

So, here's a couple of pictures from yesterday evening.

In a pub.

With my friend.

Knitting.

Drinking.

Laughing and chatting.

Smoking (well, my friend does, but not me)

And yes, that's my almost finished drink right here, and that's my current knitting project.  I'm hoping to have my "idea" completed so that it can be given as gifts soon.  This piece will be a placemat, and also I'm making matching coasters, and napkin rings.  Each set will be a different colour...can't you just see it?  A white tablecloth, with each place setting being a different colour?  Cheerful. Unique.

I promise to put more pictures up of my knitting, as progress is made.

My dear friend, whose face I deliberately left out of the picture, is also very busy with needles, hooks and yarn.  Here she's crocheting squares to put together for a blanket, and she's also busy knitting scarves, which she plans to give as Christmas gifts.

It really was a lovely evening.  Warm enough for us to sit outside in the pub garden.  Live music from inside the bar wafting out to us.  It was Irish Country Music last night.

We meet every two weeks.  I'm already looking forward to our next night out!

I hope you all have something special to look forward to in your social life also.

Namaste, my Blog Friends.

All content ©artysane

Garden Inspiration

Summer really has finally arrived here!  After so many rainy days, and nights, and weeks!  And suddenly the garden has gone wild with insane growth!

So.  On this hot, sunny day, the bushes needed to be tackled.  You can't really see my garden in this picture, Friends.  I took it from my lounge window, and basically "my" garden begins where the shed is, and continues down to the end.  I'll have to take some real photos of my little piece of ground later ..

 It was hot work...and now there's lots of "rubbish" to remove.  I think I said the other day..and if I didn't, I will now...that the previous tenants weren't so much into gardening, so it's going to take some work to get everything looking really nice and spiffy again...

In the meantime though, as I cool down, I'll share with you a poem I wrote in 2005, after a different hot day, working in a different garden....

Sevenling

Saturday afternoon in the garden,

Pulling weeds, planting corn -

Enjoying the refreshing breeze.

I sat on the swing

Shelling English Garden Peas

And made my plans to freeze

The harvest.

I hope you are all enjoying wonderful weather, and life in general.  

Be blessed with sunshine..if not from the sky, from your hearts! 

Namaste

All content ©artysane

Sunday's Scribble

When I began writing here 4 days ago... get that, friends... FOUR WHOLE DAYS!!  (too funny)...well, I promised myself that I would put something on here every day.

Well, today I have to tell you that normal programming is almost being broadcast again from my inner being.

Note I said...almost.

But whatever.  I've been to work.  I've tried my best.  Problem is that last night again, when I was home, and it was dark, and my head hit the pillow..my mind didn't rest.  Consequently, neither did the rest of me really.  I think I was lucky if 3 hours of sleep occurred.  And now I'm absolutely shattered!  And unpleasantly dizzy.  I've a feeling that I need to drink some water, as it's a beautifully gorgeous day outside, and it may just be possible (coughs in embarrassed fashion) that I neglected my hydration!  How dreadful for a health care professional to say that.  

Following the end of my shift today, I went along to watch some lawn bowls.  The people are so nice and friendly.  I've been offered lessons in fact, and plan to go along on Tuesday evening to have a go! 

The sun is still shining even now...it's about 8 pm, and I'm home.  The neighbours are grilling and it smells so good...I think I shall have to find some food myself now!  And then a bit of knitting, I think.  And then?  Sleep!

It's not a life of wild activity, but it's my little life, and I love it.

I hope your weekend has been wonderful.

Namaste

All content ©artysane

A Saturday Confession

I know that the sentiment below is truth.

But, my Blog friends,  I have to make a confession to make right now.

I cannot find a truthful positive thought in my head today.  I can force my tongue to say something good.  I can FORCE my fingers to type something good.  But it would not be truth.

For you see, yesterday something was said to me which just was unsettling.  

Does it seem to you sometimes that a person who you thought was a friend, or a trusty work colleague, will be just too keen to "throw you under the bus"?

It does to me since yesterday afternoon, at about 2.20.  

And why did this happen?  Because I choose to deliver quality and thorough care to a person, rather than limit myself to 20 minutes here and 10 minutes there.  I do not neglect anyone.  Everyone who I have dealings with are cared for equally.  And I have chosen to do my work correctly, and in a thoroughly caring and complete manner.  The entire person needs care.  Mental, physical, spiritual.  And if all of my work gets done, does it matter too desperately, if it takes me 15 minutes longer in its' entirety??  It is my decision and mine alone, if I choose to give care to the best of my ability, and remain at work for 15 minutes longer to do my notes.  It does not affect anyone else, surely?  It's my decision, I repeat it.  I will stay on the floor and care, rather than sit in the office and write notes, if it is needed.

The end of my shift is always calm.  The beginning of my shift is always calm.  The middle of my shift is calm.  There are smiles from those in my care. If there are tears, here is my shoulder.  If you wobble when you walk, I am here to steady you.  

I do not mean to sound big headed.  Because I'm not that way, truly.  But I'm just upset a bit by the attitudes I come across.  

So I refuse to take the words - the disdain - which were aimed at me.

However, even though I will not change the way I work, those words still upset my equilibrium somewhat.

During yesterdays' shift, I felt sad, uneasy, depressed.  And when I am like that, I become quiet, withdrawn, silent.  My work continues, but in a subdued manner.

And, I'm afraid, my mood hasn't changed too much after a nights' sleep.  So, I'm hoping that talking about all of this will help me a little, because I have to go back today for probably more of the same.

It's more proof that every word, every action, we do each day can affect someone else.  It might be for the positive.  It may be for the negative.

All I can do is strive to affect people for the positive side.  

But in the meantime, I also confess that instead of going to work today, I would much rather be going to the beach...(a picture taken in April)...

...or staying home to knit or stitch..this is a Christmas card which I stitched earlier in the year...for use in December... 

It is art which helps to keep my sanity in tact.  Believe me when I tell you that my knitting will go to work with me, and I will take some time to do a row or two during my break.  It helps.  Knitting is a type of "active" meditation for me.  When you cannot sit and do an "eyes closed" meditation, a row of repetitive purl or knit stitches can slow my mind.  Or just going to a quiet corner of the hallway, and a couple of deep breaths.  A moment to concentrate on at least one movement of the Eight Strand Silk Brocade.  (Take a look here, if you would like to know more)

I will be fine.  I will be peaceful.  All will be well, and all manner of things will be well.  But before hand, I tell you that I am going to breathe, practice my silks, and knit!!

Namaste

All content ©artysane